Me in the Alps in Winter 2015

Me in the Alps in Winter 2015
Not Just Surviving, But Thriving!

Friday, October 3, 2014

Just Be Direct, Already! (Why New Yorkers Do Better Here)


Therapeutic Mushroom Hunting in Denmark 

   Well I can't write about having fun living in Germany right now because it hasn't been anything like that lately. Just a hard slog emotionally every day. 
   So I went to see my friend Anette in Denmark. A trip comparable in distance to traveling to central California from Ashland. And slept and read when it rained and walked around quiet lakes when the sun shone. Gave myself a week off from trying to understand everything German. And a week away from the big city, which is a harder change than anything. And it worked! I came back much less worried about everything.
   Ah, the magical power of vacation!
   Meanwhile J was hitting a wall at work and was ready to quit after several non-productive meetings with his boss. It looked like we were going to give it up after just 2 months. Then some English friends sat us down for a chat and said, "Look here. You're not communicating like a German. Time to be VERY DIRECT." Which is almost impossible for an Oregonian, but he did it! And they listened! Now he's on a new team and things are going very well. And it looks like we're staying.
   Today is his 2nd paid holiday. It was a Catholic one in August. This one is German reunification day. And amazingly it's not raining! I am on my way to Dorfen, where my New Zealand friend lives. J is of course riding...he knows how to get happy and that's good.
   Of course I'm trying to be upbeat when I write these posts. But there's a whole other side to moving here. I'm working my version of Step 11 right now:


We sought through giving thanks, asking questions, and listening carefully for answers, to improve our conscious contact with our Higher Power to improve our integration into our new country.

So: I'm thankful to be here. And it's okay that I'm struggling, even if you and my friends think I should be excited all the time. I am not sure 54 is the right age to do this. However I did just meet a 65 year old man last night who retired here from New York 3 years ago. He doesn't speak German, even after many years trying (a dozen). But he loves it here.

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